just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
