just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Randomize
