we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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