Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
