i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
