I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
