if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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