Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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