White coat. Heels.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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