Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
Randomize