I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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