hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
