i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
