so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.