i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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