I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
It's official drugs can't kill me
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
