At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
too bad you live with your parents still
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
