Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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