i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
Randomize