Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize