i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
You drinking a lot?
Define a lot
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
21 People Confess What It’s Really Like At An Orgy
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
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THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Don't tell me you're on acid again