Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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