I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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