Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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