Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
