great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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