oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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