Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
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