Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
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