i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
