I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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