the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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