Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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