well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He shit in the fireplace
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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