I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
