Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I think weed is turning my hair brown
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
me + whiskey = a bad person
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
