You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Randomize
