i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
and you fell through a lawn chair
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