Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
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