Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
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