Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
