so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
