You're completely useless in the revolution.
We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
