last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
23 Concerns People Have When They’re About To Have Sex With Someone New
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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