Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.

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(334): View more from Alabama

I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.

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(404): View more from Georgia

can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.

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(856): View more from New Jersey

Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.

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27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Read it at the TFLN blog
(202): View more from Washington, DC

I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.

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(815): View more from Illinois

i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic

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(248): View more from Michigan

I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.

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(312): View more from Illinois

Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.

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