He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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