i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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