i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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