Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
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