I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.