Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
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