boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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