The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
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